Midori

It's rumored that Midori was named after the Japanese melon liqueur consumed by his parents who met during a cast party for "Saturday Night Fever" in discotheque Studio 54. He shows no interest in dancing but prefers a mix of vodka and 7-up as an invigorating substitute for Mountain Dew. Sometimes, he's overcome by a general restlessness due to a feeling of cultural displacement among walnut-brained chimps wielding weapons over their heads to fight for a breakaway society. His therapist thinks it's just his mid-life crisis and all he needs is some Suntory time.