#1 Brock Tonklin

APPLICATION FOR REHABILITATION: NAME: Brocklin Tonklin “Boxed Wine Junkie” ADDICTION: ‘El Cheapo’ Boxed Wine AGE: 31.5 RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Plays the field PROFESSION: Bottle recycler repairman at Dangerway CATCHPHRASE: Hello down there! FIRST REALIZED PROBLEM: I’ve been sleepin’ on a dumpster for a little over a decade. I like the height, feels real swanky like a penthouse ya know? The vertigo makes it tough, this box right here steadies the nerves. HOPES & DREAMS: I feel like i could look better. Someday I’ll have a real 2nd floor apartment and a real bed for some beauty sleep. I used to be so handsome…