Mixed feelings

It sprang up from a thought I cannot now place. It started off from a reality I can now barely face. I am strong. But my mind tells me otherwise. I am worried over a fear I should resent. I am not worried maybe bitter. But how can I tell? My heart aches; not from heartbreak, my mind wanders away. I have no clue where. I wanna be mad. But I must be strong. I wanna give up but I must stand up. I wish I knew one word for all these. I wouldn't have need of tiring you with my boring Unending lines of mixed feelings _ Paul Elenora Each color reprents a feeling, a thought being thought and felt independent of the other.