The process of searching for oneself is a tiring and torturous journey for me. While for many it can be a worthwhile spiritual journey, I can understand why you may want to stop or run away from it. However, the journey is unavoidable. So, embrace it. Because the journey is not actually reaching the end goal and finally "finding yourself." The journey is, in fact, the process of moving forward and experiencing life; fully and whole. It is not about the "Aimless Search," but about the discoveries that take place during the process.
What we seek will come of itself, just as spring comes after winter.